Half full...

I wish to see you

like i see you 

when i wish...

that half moon you wished upon

from behind the curtains of your empty room

firing a deep sigh

burning my world sky

i am that faraway moon, 

half split

of your whole wish,

i am every bit

As you then, blink

in your circled smoke,

i sink

dancing at the melodies of your mad heartbeats

that last sip of coffee getting in between your fingers, cold

it is me! there...you have been told!

leave me no more waiting

i ran out of myself being on hold...

but as i brew in, to touch your lips

in my mystical off to you, deadly awakening trips

steamed again, i flow

just like that pregnant river of caffeinated hope

you know?

that cheap lighter you always lose

somewhere around 

hard to be when needed,  found

but in your ripped jeans pocket

of me, you can fill of it, a bucket

a list of fires, your eyes start with

every fat finger click, for light

that pillow which is usually, white

i am that one clear thought, bright

for the longer sleepless night

where you breathe your dreams

one by one to the velvet ceiling

in uncensored delight

with each cigarette, a flight

to where we are as wrong as right

i am the impossible, possible

when you call for the love company

i am the pixels of that perfect shot

of that sweet message you never sent

i am the final dot

you forget to write

the pen you leave by your bed

holding the empty sheet tight

those scattered thoughts, i lead...

an invading of my every breathing your name, fleet

unorganized like an army of freedom fighters

my eyes stares martyrs

arrow at your enemy all-nighters

and shoot

that unfinished book, i thug

i word myself for your eyes hug

may be i as well kindle

into that white tee, i gentle

for your poetic skin to handle

as you put on those glares i hate

take off at your love gates wide shut

ah..and that small arm cut

u cant remember when or how, but..

i was that salty drop of blood

now what

i would be it all that you can five- sense

or sixth...

i would to your love be as small as immense...

i would vanish of my world to vanish in yours

that water bottle you dearly hold

that love word you never told

that English leather chair

this life's fair unfair

i would be the squirrel by the lake for you...

and the weird bird i pray for you to once...see

filled of you...

and of me, half full

for i only wish to see you,

just like whenever you wish,

everywhere...you see me.

HAPPY  BIRTHDAY SHAH...

His name is Khan and He is Framed...

 

In the cell

They call n-956

so many walls i see

why only four they said to be?

made of mothers tears

carved with fathers ' helpless fears

shattered dreams on iron beds

covered with injustice sheets

stained with hate

My name is my fate

For my pride, i got blamed

My name is Khan, and i got framed.

I leave my body to my head

one step at a stare

i can see them everywhere

Raising fingers and waving flags

writing articles and Hashtags

A fraud it is or a scam

they jail me now for who i am

i wish for that, they saw me instead

in time they will

Dry around me in the well

And for my silence, i got shamed.

They locked me in, they think

in my own freedom, i blink

Anger is my dear host

that too i can't attend to

what did i do?

Nothing

i know and they do too

But still

Here i am

sitting still

in youssef's well

waiting for the passers by to pick me up

in my head, a little, i rest

in my beloved ones's warm nest

its getting cold out here

so i fold my arms around my heart

never have we been this apart

In my head, it hurts too

what did i do?

Nothing, the voice said

that i know, and they do too

How is he holding up?

I wonder

the roaring thunder

wakes me up

hang in there my son

After the longest night, there will be a rising sun

that is always then any darkness, stronger

I close my eyes on his face

I beat my lungs out to the breath race

within the walls it's getting tighter

I am a kinght fighter

Suddenly the world seemed lighter

at the warmth of his teary smile

Its not about you, the voice in my head,

said

its about being alive and dead

what then did i do?

Nothing

I know that, they do too

My friend Raj,  i remember 

his mother's delicious sweets every diwali,

she especially for me made and sent

my school teacher, Mrs Singh

giving me honors for Science in the seventh grade

like a cold blade

memories come rushing through

what did i do?

my father is a Khan

my mother is a Chibber

we are all the same

although we all beg to differ

when it rains we were raised to dance

but some of us chose,

to only get wet.  

  

Coming Home…

 Come with me…

Let’s take a quiet stroll

I know the days on you, had taken quite a toll

I know it gets only harder for now

But again see, that's when the days will get a better show!

Here by the large mustard field of your mind

Let’s go find a lil hiding smile,

There at the corner of your letting your baby brother win the latest video games boys night

At his innocent laugh as you fake a cute fight

He is the nine years old iron man and it’s quite, by you, 

all right..

Or here by the side of your soul sister rehearsal before the mirror with you as her only audience, late after you sneaked in some Mc and fries

The harder she always, for perfection..tries

That beautiful star born of the moon and the sun…

There..you tip toe where he hides, to off his hardest days, run…

You see him sweat his longest night off

On a 9 speed fast, or ten

Dead-lifting the weight of the whole world upon his heart..

As calm as the ocean before the storm

He holds ur face in between his eyelids, and rains…

And you watch him from behind the bar

That he already set higher with a bench

You see him now..

Reaching out every corner to hold you up once more..

A cold cup of coffee by his side 

And a crowded ashtray

You quietly hold of his blurry eyes, a ray

Stronger we stay…

Papa…you say…

I am for you, sooner than soon

Defeating the injustice goon..

And wait for me today papa..

Spread your arms king size

For wherever I may be 

For you, I will always be Home. 

My note to love...

 

All the eyes that aren’t your eyes...

Can’t see

All that is not seen by your eyes, is unseen

All those hairs that get messed up by the mad winds, are still

And still... are those mad winds that don’t mess up with your sky hair...

The air that is not invited by your aristocratic nose is unfair

For this life’s party only begins at the gush of your highness nose aired exhale...

All the words that aren’t born off the womb of your fleshy lips, are wordless

And nameless, are all the names, until you call them ..

so i feel for all these faces, anonymously living behind the bars of freedom    

they think they exist! 

and to this thought , even, revolt!

but until you lay on them this- laying in a bed of mischief- eye

their best bet would be to happily just, die!

nothing makes any sense, until you forensically, do

pouring in tots of stares trips...    

Jack-Danieling all the lines in your lashes drips, 

O what do they know...

Sober would be all Ghalib’s Ghazal if not in your each glimpse grips...

Wordless is the world until you world into it..

Lifeless is the life, until you into it, life...

What sunshine are they talking about?

The sun comes up only at your every blink..

And how do they see light in the children’s smiles?

If all the children’ s happiness lights up only at your smile?

Heard them say, roses naturally bloom in spring

Snow innocently falls in winter..

when seasons follow each other at your every head tilt... 

of the wildest dreams, weaving my late nights' secret quilt

But all I know..

That all the magic fields your spring feet don’t upon-step, are arid

And all the expecting clouds, you don’t melt with your fire stare, are sterile..

Heard some talks about birds chirping at mornings dew

And rivers flowing in the arms of the potent shores...

But all the mornings bird at your chirping silence..

And the potent shores only climax in the arms of your Hapi rivers’ glares...

And what is it all about volcanoes burning the Rocky lands heart

When my lava heart erodes only at your every dragon breath

Yes. It is that destructively, apt!

Only at your every mighty coming, that I erupt

Nothing is anything until you are

Nothing is as close as far

My moon, sun, and every whispering star...

It is not a sky above me, until you into my night, night

I don’t see what Newton astonishingly achieved watching his falling apple

I know all the heart apples fall in your hands love touch...

And the bride earth then, at your fingers play...blush

and in my genius physical mind now, I hush...

For it all in you begins, and ends

All that is in me broken at your eyes call, mends

You rain upon your desert rose

Off your every coming, my hopeful wind blows

Soaked in a lucid dream

Wrapped in your arms, or so I seem

set free beneath a solid window

and with my crippled wings of poetry,

i charmingly, soar

Wondering how could I have ever been anywhere else before?

When all I have ever been therein,

 is by then, Home.

My lifeless life is but within you, a life.

◦

20 seconds...

 

20 seconds...
They said it should last for 20 seconds...
Oh my darling...
what do they know
how many times per second 
had i just closed my eyes on that thought--
feeling your love arms holding my-
now small to fit body- and hiding me from the world
how many times per second
had i breathed this air only because for one second
you may had had that breath into you and out
its a small world after all
and the winds fly from wherever you are to me
teaching universal geography currently,
so i know for sure that lovers inhale each others 
across the skies of distance 
exhale with each breath a flying life-kiss.
20 seconds...
they said it can heal your pains
when someone who loves you so much
_no one does more than i do by the way-
hugs you as tight for 20 seconds
you are no longer in any pain
you heal...
this i do feel!
when in my every night dream
we do.
healed
within our souls shield 
this darkness, for 20 seconds then,
bloom into a mustard field
of acceptance
 
20 seconds...
a wish that i pray only to come true
a red in my heart that turns every night blue
a me into myself growing into you...
a life that i claim and deny 
a when that asks me and a roaring answering.. fly! 
a morning run that i everyday do
as if i am running off you to you...
and the time stands then still
i wish my burning breath by then could tell
those worn out racing heart beats
and the sweet tears roll treats
on the wet face
that i for once will happily dew
20 seconds ...
i think i can then everything, forgive 
be where they say i can live
i would call your name as a prayer
like i always do
and hymn you my every unborn poem
of you
may be i don't know how it feels like in your arms
but i know there is a wise why i don't
one that i can't for the life of me, accept
may be when it's our time i will
only, for 20 seconds...
Or more...
again, they say
what do they know
i would never by then let go 
20 seconds..
in the cobblestone streets of our finally  happening...?
or in the sunshine of your spotless mind library..
where my Home theater will play
in the background of my rhyming fear

what is this now!
O another silly tear...
Ahh ...i see you here...
The you coming from your eyes heavens gate
and for 20 seconds
i would hide in your heart of fate
and plead guilty 
smell as our eternal soul encounter, misty
may you never relate...
life would then be for me complete..
i would take those minor burns pains to my skin
inhale wherever it hurts inside of you to my within
warmth your shivering bones in my flaming chest
reach out to that forgotten patella 
and be for the blue bird of your chirping eyes
a nest...
as i blow for you tonight
one candle per verse
may they lasts forever and beyond
those 20 seconds of lifetime. 

 
    

     

That Necessary...

Hungry! 

for you..

like i can savor these juicy words

off your mind lips raw...

like i haven't had in a lifetime, off you, a bite

Thirsty!

for you..

like the desert of my arid waiting...

that i would sip off your every half glance,

of my love, a river...

and refill of your starry sky hairs,

for my longer night, a night...

There is something about you
that i can't explain
for my orphan heart, your eyes are but a mother
for my gypsy soul,
your voice is but home.
and when you smile,
poems blossom at the mustard fields of my lips
like Akhenaton hymns in your name
the Aton of my atheist faith in our happening
and the Satan of my hell inviting to our happening,
... doubts
like a sun kiss your hairs, mess with my mind rosy cheeks then, Sirius
they said i am a lunatic to believe
a fertile dream of you every day in my unsaid words, i conceive
delivering my rhyming children in the cave of our silence
and nursing them my lifeline of patience.
understanding it all is but the enemy
knowing why, fires back at your hope fortresses, 
catapult balls of despair arranging my desire archers,
my fingers burst in dancing butterflies
on the tunes of my love creed
what is it that you need?
that my heart can afford
...or can't...
when will it fruit, that flesh dream we, per blink, seed?
where would my air dyiptiques and Creed...
and if ever my arms would tuck your hairs into my bosom of time
but then i put on my blues sneakers
turn as loud the volume of wait
running miles in the cities of your fairytale dimples
every time i close my eyes to drop another pearl of love sweat
the streets of your words hug my stammering steps
and the empty lighthouse at the top of your aristocratic nose
 calls my shortened breath for a rest
i climb in my worn out joggers of expectation,
to the flashing beacon of acceptance
the world seems too small from up there and bigger is my sky
a fleet of tears roll upon my sea face
watching my dream ships fade into the horizon of your angry absence
and in the wind howl
i listen but to your lost sailor eyes call...
the tune of melancholy
the sparrows of irony dance in the foggy temple of my wishes
as the pregnant clouds of my heavy heart, deliver
the star at your every scar, shiver
as i reach out my hands full of your coming to me
in the birdy air,,
and i breathe you in..
that unnoticed...
and yet, that necessary. 

 

Safety measures...

You said
As close...
as distant
in our world my love,
there is no distance
No safety measures
We dive into the realms of the sweet danger
with every breath
we eye hug with every sneaked in selfie stare
we, with our every word stripped bare, lip lock
and we melt...
in the fire of our dream-handshake- yearning
and resurrect...
with our every Isis upon Her Osiris magical wish-meeting teardrop
and roam in the Lisbon Diaries cobblestone streets of our minds around
we don't wear but our brave hearts skin
sprinkling but our unloved love aroma yang-yin...
we coffee of the same cup at the corner of our old town visions tip
and take a bite of the same plate of time in our own world 
my love
we share our cheeks for a tear fall
and hold our hands soaked in pain
we inch in, one beat at a touch
A Nile within us, with every outer drought 
would flow
For we know
they all leave when they come
we have nothing, when we have only some...
silence plays louder than a drum
when all we can afford then, is a hum
flesh to flesh turns into dust
every life breath is a call to death
reborn we shall remain
in our own home of exile
so here we are
my love
dancing under the rains of hope
drenched in the falling skies of our possibility
laughing at the odds of our happening
and happening despite every odd,
laughing
one soul we are
hanging at the edge of our own world
fearlessly
with a life thread of flash lights...
and poetry.